Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Movie Reviews - Dustin Wayde Mills marathon: Easter Casket, Bath Salt Zombies, and Night of the Tentacles

One of my friends is friends with Dustin Wayde Mills and he introduced me to Mills' movies. Before tonight, I had already watched Puppet Monster Massacre and Zombie A-Hole and thought they were both great and campy. I was in a horror mood tonight and wanted to watch these before watching the movies I got yesterday (bunch of potentially cruddy movies, I made a post about it last night here). So I spent the night watching Easter Casket, Bath Salt Zombies, and Night of the Tentacles. They're no budget/low budget films and for being made on just a couple thousand dollars they're pretty great!

Easter Casket basically is about the Easter Bunny getting pissed the Catholics want to get rid of him so he goes on a mission to destroy a group voting to oust him, while Father Asher is sent to destroy the Easter Bunny.

Bath Salt Zombies is based on the outbreak of "zombies" in the US after a few people consumed the drug bath salts and went a bit crazy and cannibalistic. In the movie, a scientist (portrayed by Dustin Mills himself) creates a new high dose formula to get an edge on other drug dealers in the area and the main character gets addicted. After consuming one dose, obviously you go crazy and become a cannibal for a short period of time with increased strength, then wake up with no memory. As this is going on, a DEA agent is trying to crack down on the distribution of the drugs that culminates in a standoff with the other main character.

Night of the Tentacles is about a guy who has a heart attack while jerking off to the girl in the apartment below him masturbating. Then he sells his soul to the Devil for a new heart, which is now located in a box that he keeps in his room. As long as the heart is treated right, he'll live forever. Thus, he is forced to feed the heart some meat to keep it satisfied. Hijinks ensue as he has to find things to feed it without having to resort to humans all the while creating a relationship with his neighbor downstairs. It's a play on Faust (included his new heart being referenced to as FAUSTHEART 2.0 in the contract the main character doesn't get to read). And I have to say, I love the line "you blasphemy a lot for an atheist."

I like to think of Dustin Wayde Mills as the Kevin Smith of horror. He's chunk and bearded like Smith. He's incredibly vulgar but with very realistic dialogue. He makes sure he has a bit role in each of his movies (in Zombie A-Hole he was a hilarious voodoo doctor). The one area that he differs from Smith is that his movies are filmed on a small percentage of what Smith had originally and whereas Smith talked about nudity, Mills includes loads of nudity.

The nudity isn't even needed half the time but he makes sure to get a dose in each movie. I briefly listened to the commentary on Bath Salt Zombies and in one scene, he specifically said "this scene is here for more nudity" lol! Granted, it was worth it because it's of the incredibly hot actress Erin R. Ryan (who is now a celebrity crush of mine because her involvement in Easter Casket and Bath Salt Zombies). I had a friend check out Zombie A-Hole and he commented how the movie would be at least 10 minutes shorter if the nudity wasn't as gratuitous as it was. Sometimes it is a bit weird and out of place (such as in Bath Salt Zombies where a girl is randomly stripping while the main character is taking the new form of bath salts). I'm not really complaining, just commenting on it. It definitely lives up to a classic horror standard of lots of bloodiness, cussing, and nudity.

Now one thing you have to keep in mind before watching the films is that they're ultra-low budget so don't expect a masterpiece. You are in for a good ride, that's for sure. Yet the computer graphics are sometimes exaggerated as if it were a comic book/anime movie. Some of the real special effects aren't perfect (Night of the Tentacles had the main character ejaculates on the floor and it looks like they simply spilled milk instead of trying to create something close to jism; Bath Salt Zombies had a character start bludgeoning someone in the face with a rock yet the rock was obviously 6 inches away from the face). I also had a lot of problems with the sound quality on Bath Salt Zombies, where it would constantly fluctuate. I was watching on my computer and had to have the sound go from a 12 to a 100 throughout the movie because some scenes were too soft whereas others were too loud.

Overall though, the movies are very worth it to watch. Mills reuses a lot of his cast again in the movies so it's fun to see the characters have completely different roles. The writing is fantastic, it is very fluid and has a real world feel to it.

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